Abiding Over Striving

— by Brett Hagler

There are valleys and mountain top moments when you commit to what Eugene Peterson popularized as “a long obedience in the same direction.” Many outcomes are out of our control. But whether we face gut-wrenching adversity or fulfill our wildest dreams, we continuously have to choose what we will allow to define us. That choice -- more than anything else -- will shape the most important thing about us: who we become. 

As an entrepreneur, staying rooted in my core identity is my most difficult challenge. I will never have it all figured out, but I can share my story and insights in hopes of helping you better live from your position in Christ. 

I became a follower of Jesus at age 23 and started New Story two years later. Before then, I had a failed startup, and my dream company turned me away. I was an underdog, driven by achievement, and desperately wanted to build a thriving organization.

While I fell in love with Jesus and made radical life changes, I did not fully understand the importance of abiding in Christ over striving for my venture. I didn’t grasp that God cared most about the health of my soul, and outcomes were secondary. I allowed the trajectory of my venture to shape my identity.

With the help of an incredible team, hard work, and God opening doors -- my little venture grew faster than I imagined. I quickly became obsessed with building something great.

It seemed like overnight, I went from a failure to a founder of a high potential startup. We went from $0 to tens of millions in revenue. We started by helping a few families in Haiti but quickly impacted thousands of families with safe housing. Accolades followed. 

I was Forbes 30 Under 30, and Fast Company, year over year, named us one of the World’s Most Innovative Nonprofits. Apple TV even filmed a documentary about our journey to building the world’s first community of 3D printed homes. The flood of recognition and growth opportunities in my twenties made it more challenging to stay centered on what matters most -- my identity in Christ. 

The ambition was easy to justify. New Story exists to help some of the world’s most vulnerable families. James tells us that religion that’s undefiled is when you take care of the least of those around you. (James 1:27) But my intentions weren’t completely pure. 

My drive was a blend of genuinely wanting to help others and the recognition that came with an exciting startup that could refresh and make a significant change in the social impact sector. New Story started to take up more of my identity. Jesus was present, and His fingerprints are all over my venture, but I didn’t desire Him more than everything else. I wanted Him and everything else.

I fell for the oldest lie -- the lie that’s been around since the garden of Eden. I thought I would not be satisfied unless I worked hard enough to achieve something new and grand. Then I’ll be worthy and accomplished. The more I believed this lie, the further I pulled myself out of the Father’s love and into the distant country like the prodigal son.

Things started to change in 2017 when I joined Praxis as a fellow. My time there helped me long for a new quality I wanted to define my life: humility. I made humility my new mantra, and I developed a healthy fear of allowing success to break me down internally.

Embracing humility led me to develop a life of prayer, seek more counsel, and take a sabbatical just before the pandemic. On my sabbatical, I read The Return of The Prodigal Son. In that story, I saw who I become when I put my full identity in my venture. 

I learned the prodigal son is much more than a young man that left home to chase his appetites and squander his inheritance. That was me from 15-23. I learned as faith-driven entrepreneurs, we all can be prodigals when we leave our core identity in search of accolades, outcomes, and status. 

We use our venture as a vehicle to search for worth, love, and satisfaction. But the results will never satisfy our soul when we care more about what we’re achieving than who we’re becoming.

In Luke 10, Jesus sends out the apostles to do great work. They left their homes and healed, increased numbers, and crushed their quarterly goals. When they returned to Jesus, they were more excited about the accomplishments than rejoicing that they’re with Jesus. 

However, your real source of joy isn’t merely that these spirits submit to your authority, but that your names are written in the journals of heaven and that you belong to God’s kingdom. This is the true source of your authority. - Jesus

When I leave home, and it happens every time I idolize anything other than Christ, The Father is always pursuing and welcoming me back with outstretched arms. I am unconditionally loved independent of the success or failure of my venture. “You are my beloved son, on you my favor rests.” These words shape my freedom. This truth is why I can remain hopeful regardless of the health of my venture. 

When New Story is successful, I am humbled and grateful knowing that everything good is a gift. This past year has also shown me how quickly circumstances can change. Success can shift to failure in the blink of an eye. And when New Story is not doing as well, I know He is still near -- loving me into His likeness and pruning my character. 

When I’m living out of my core identity, I’m attached to a vine that gives nutrients for goodness. I’m home. The byproducts are fruit for myself and others. I will make better decisions, I will lead better, and I will love my neighbor better. Here are three truths that help me lean into my identity in Christ:

My first job as a child of God is to receive and live out of God’s love. Before we ask ourselves, “How do I love God?” we must ask, “How can I allow myself to be loved by God?”. When I can openly receive the Father’s love, I can then love those around me. Impacting the world for good must spring from the inside out. 

Secondly, I stay grounded in Christ by knowing that He cares more about obedience than outcomes. He desires me to abide, not to strive for the sake of earning anything from Him or others. He cares more deeply for how I love others than the revenue my venture brings in this quarter. 

Lastly, our Father is very pleased with our daily, good work. As a founder, I can still be an ambitious leader who aims to be excellent in a craft. I can be bold and dream big if that’s what He’s called me to do. He’s gifted me with unique skills, resources, and an extraordinary team to do our part in building a better world. I also am the prodigal son when I squander those good gifts. So I’ll keep leveraging what’s been entrusted to me with a humble pursuit of excellence. But while I lead New Story, I know its success is not the end game. The success (or failure) of my venture is just the means to the highest end -- to love others as He first loved me.

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[ Photo by Boxed Water Is Better on Unsplash ]