Episode 105 – How the Constitution Protects Faith Driven Entrepreneurs with Kelly Shackelford

Today’s guest has argued in front of the United States Supreme Court…Now, normally we try to list multiple accolades and interesting facts about the guest, but do you really need anything other than that? 

Kelly Shackelford is the President & CEO of First Liberty, the largest law firm in the country dedicated exclusively to protecting the first amendment rights of Americans—that is, freedom of religion. 

Kelly came on to talk to us about his entrepreneurial journey in starting First Liberty, how business leaders can better understand their constitutional rights, and yes, what it’s like to argue in front of the Supreme Court.

Useful Links:

First Liberty

The Shackelford Sessions

Judge Rules in Favor of Kentucky Church


Episode Transcript

*Some listeners have found it helpful to have a transcription of the podcast. Transcription is done by an AI software. While technology is an incredible tool to automate this process, there will be misspellings and typos that might accompany it. Please keep that in mind as you work through it. The FDE movement is a volunteer-led movement, and if you’d like to contribute by editing future transcripts, please email us.

 

Henry Kaestner: Welcome back to the Faith Driven Entrepreneur podcast. This is an episode that we’ve been looking forward to since we’ve been in this Covid-19 season that we’ve all found ourselves in. And that is really just looking at this head on. What does it look like for a Faith Driven Entrepreneur to navigate through what they can or can’t do? What they should or should do as responsible citizens and his business leaders at this particular time. And so we’ve got a special guest who is going to have a perspective that I think is super valuable. Later, When we have guests on the podcast, we may have other views on this as well. But we are really, really blessed to have Kelly Shackelford, who himself is an entrepreneur on our podcast today. Kelly, welcome.

Kelly Shackelford: Thanks for having me on. Happy to do it.

Henry Kaestner: So, Kelly, before we talked about this season, we found ourselves in. You are an entrepreneur. You had started up this practice and have been doing it successfully for a while. Give us some background. Tell us about your personal story.

Kelly Shackelford: Well, really, mine goes back to, I guess, where I was in high school and what my gifts were in analytical thinking and speaking. And I thought, well, gosh, I can either be a pastor or a lawyer. And people kind of said, well, that’s like a God or Satan choice, thinking to be a pastor or a lawyer. And, you know, I went to my youth pastor and I said, you know, here’s what I’m thinking. What do you think? And he gave me great advice. He said, you know, if you’re called to be a minister, it’s a wonderful calling. He said, I will say this. I know a lot of Christian pastors. And, boy, we sure could use some more Christian lawyers. And as I started analyzing my DNA, I realized probably more meant for law than being a pastor. And so when I got out, finished really my first year after law school working for a federal judge, which you do for one year, and then really had a lot of offers that these big law firms and I just felt like was like I’d suffocate there, like that wasn’t what God wanted me to do. And I remember sitting in my little office and thinking, what do you want to do? And I thought, well, I want to use my legal skills because I feel like I’ve been shown I should do that. But I want to help pastors and churches with religious freedoms and our founding principles. And I’d even like to go to seminary if I could. I laughed because I was like, there’s no job to do these things. And two weeks later, I met two guys that I’d never met before, partners in big law firms. They called me out the blue, asked me to go to lunch. They said they’d started to give time for religious freedom and they’re starting to give so many calls that it was hurting their ability to make a living. And they were wondering, would I be willing to come on, do legal cases, help pastors, churches, religious freedoms and our founding principles? And I could even go to seminary part time if they wanted me to. And I said, if you’re interested in these things at all. Our only question is how much you need to live on. And these guys pitched in out of their pocket to get me started with a nonprofit and a little over 30 years later. And now First Liberty is the largest legal group in the country, nonprofit that all we do is religious freedom cases. So it was a God thing that I didn’t even know would exist. And he moved me into it. And I love doing what I get to do every day.

Henry Kaestner: Our listeners who don’t know. Tell us about First Liberty. What do you guys do?

Kelly Shackelford: We’re the largest nonprofit in the country that all we do is religious freedom. So, you know, if you’re a fifth grade boy, your name is Giovanni Rubio and you live in Miami area and you’re from a poor family and you’re told you can come to school and during free reading time, you can read a book you want until you bring your Bible and then you’re told we can’t have religious books at school. What do you do? You know, you can’t go out and hire a team of attorneys. And so what happens is we come in at first liberty. We represent them free of charge. We bring in the best litigators in the country who all donate their time.

And the result is we don’t just win for Giovanni and his family, which we did in that case, but we set a precedent that protects everybody in the country who cares about religious freedom. And so it’s really a unique way of representing people, which I can go into if you want. But our model is different than every other model of any sort of legal nonprofit out there by people who are given their time. Really it’s the body of Christ operating like it should.

Henry Kaestner: One of the big keys and kind of an underlying theme that we look at Faith Driven Entrepreneur is the why of leadership. Simon Sinek, the author, writes on that. And we think that that concept, of course, is really powerful dynamic for a Faith Driven Entrepreneur. You get interviewed a ton by the press. What kind of opportunities do you have to talk about why you do what you do? Are you able to talk about your faith being a motivation for why you do this personally?

Kelly Shackelford: Not a lot because, you know, as a person who’s fighting for religious freedom, I have to be careful that it doesn’t look like I’m just fighting for the religion that I believe in. You know, the biblical views that I have. And so we have synagogues in New York that are just being horrifically discriminated against that we’re representing. I mean, we represent a wide diversity. I mean, there are people I represent that are Christians, but I don’t agree with their theology. Right. So it’s more than often than not. What I am really getting to talk about or advocate for are truths that are certainly consistent with what God wants advocated. But they’re not ideological. Now, there are exceptions. There are times when we go in, you know, just the context allows it to talk about why this is important, why those beliefs are important, and we get into some of that. But more than not, really, what I’m fighting and talking about is freedom instead of the specific theology of whatever we’re talking about.

Henry Kaestner: Now, there’s a concept that I’ve really taken to that somebody I met four or five years ago mentioned me. And that is that truth stands out in the marketplace of ideas. As you advocate for religious freedom of all different types of faiths, do you find that to resonate with you and do you see that to be true as well?

Kelly Shackelford: Yeah, absolutely, I do. I don’t know if this is somebodys phrase, but it’s just something that I’ve had as my own little phrase for at least a few decades, and that’s that the truth cannot be outnumbered. I find myself and so a lot of times in context where maybe let’s say we’re on a national TV show and there might be three people who their views are all wrong. But what we bring is true. I find that it’s sort of like the light always pierces the darkness. If you’re loving and winsome, it doesn’t matter. Even if they’re being mean or shrewd or whatever they’re doing, the truth just cuts right through it. And so one of the things we try to do before interviews is really to pray and think about how to really crystallize maybe ten thousand pages of documents into one sentence that encapsulates the truth that you’re really trying to get across. And if you do a good job with that, no matter what the interview is or whatever the discussion, you know, the question is what people are going to leave with. What are they going to remember? And those powerful statements of truth that line up with biblical truth and what the Lord says is true. I think they cut through all the misdirection and the other things that are surrounding you. It adds clarity and people are looking for those kinds of things, especially in a relativist society like we’re in now.

William Norvell: Hey, Kelly, this is William here I want to jump back a little bit. You talked about how the idea came to be and how these gentlemen gave you your start. But could you tell us a little bit about how the model evolved, how you grew to the largest religious freedom practice in the country and how you got your cases along the way and how you get your cases today and where they come from? And just let us in to a little bit more of your world.

Kelly Shackelford: Yeah, the average non profit, and I don’t care if they’re left wing or right wing or what their issue is. They have the same model, which is raise as much money as you can raise. Use that money to hire as many attorneys as you can. Put him in an office in DC or L.A. or New York, and then you fly those people around the country and you cover as many cases on your issue as you can. Whether that’s, you know, the environment or property rights or you name the issue, that is not our model. Our model is there’s all these people of faith who went to law school because they wanted to stand for what was right. They wanted to make a difference. And 30 years later, these are now the best litigators at the best law firms in the country, in fact, the best law firms in the world. And they have done great work for their clients, but they’ve never gotten to do a case for their faith. For the kingdom. And so what we do is we go and sit down with those people and we say, look, if we give you everything you need, are you willing to give your time on one of these cases? And they’re like, man, I’ve been waiting my whole life, you know, sign me up and we know what’s gonna happen when we give him that first case, mean all their talent, all their gifts, all their training, everything they’ve learned in their entire career for the first time in their life is lined up with their faith and their love for their country and freedom. And it’s kind of unfair, but we now know we have them for the rest of their lives as one of our volunteer attorneys, because once they do one of these, you know, they’re got do another one and they’re the big partner. So they give cover to the younger attorneys who want to work on these to be able to work on these. And so we’ve done this now long. If you go through the top 100 law firms in the United States, most those law firms don’t just donate their time on our cases with us, but they’ll fight each other over who gets to donate their time because it’s such a joy for them to finally get to use all this immense talent for the kingdom directly. And it really is kind of how the body of Christ is supposed to work. Right. You’ve got all these different talents that make up the body, serving one another. And so the result of having these great attorneys is these people who are in need, who could never afford, you know, five or a thousand million how much of fees that they’re going to would normally be paying for if they bought this massive team of attorneys that are with them. They have great representation. And these people who are about to die because litigation will wear you out if you’re not working on things that really matter. It really energizes these attorneys. It gives much more purpose to their whole practice. But then the result of those two things is also that all of us get blessed because of good precedents come out of that. And our win rate now for 20 years in a row has been over 90 percent win rate every year.

Last year we had 300 cases. So it’s quite a large number of cases and a high win rate. And it’s it’s just a method. I came up with this approach because I wanted to save money. I thought we can get a lot more bang for our buck if we get some of these top notch attorneys joining our people. People on our team are very bright to top from Harvard and all these places, they’re bright attorneys. But the attorneys at these major law firms, they know those local judges. They practice in those courts. So we can put these dream teams together anywhere. And it’s just a great model. And I did it because, again, average case, every ten thousand we spend, we get sixty thousand donated. So it’s like a leveraging of six to one of our resources. But what I wasn’t counting on was that win loss ratio, I mean, in the normally in the nonprofit arena, if you’re really good cause you’re fighting mammoth, you know, battles against huge entities like the government and all this normal nonprofit, if you’re really good, maybe you’re winning 40 percent of your cases. So the fact that we win 90 percent of our cases is very, very unusual. And it’s just this method. Nobody else does this. Everybody else hires their own attorneys, puts them on staff, leaves them around. But we think this is a blessing to everybody. And their models really worked. We started in Texas. We did it in Texas. And we thought, well, the need is great nationally. And we eventually went national and we didn’t know, is it scalable? Does it work? And while it’s proven out, it really does work. And it’s blessed the attorneys, it blesses the client and it blesses all of us by the freedoms and protections we get.

Henry Kaestner: So it’s super cool. And I’m amazed by the caseload. Three hundred cases is a lot. I think a lot of that speaks to the fact that you’ve been doing this for a long time. Tell us how a little bit, I’m just fascinated by the model. So how did these cases come to you? And then as you go ahead and you win the Giovani Rubio case in Florida, how do you let other jurisdictions know that this precedent has been set so that you’re helping other attorneys out there and pointing to these different types of cases? I imagine there’s some amount of outreach or publicity that kind of goes hand-in-hand with your ministry as well.

Kelly Shackelford: Yeah. Oh, good. Very good questions. We have cases, I would say two major ways. One is people have something happened to them and, you know, a lot of times they don’t know where to go. I mean, they don’t think they can hire a legal team. You know, let’s take Gabriella Perez case we had outside of Orlando. Little 5 year old girl who’s, you know, quote, caught praying over her meal in the lunch cafeteria and is told, quote, It’s not good to pray at school. She goes home. Of course, her parents are just incensed by this. And what do they do? They don’t have any money. Well, they happen to talk to either their church, maybe a Christian radio. They talk to somebody who knows, oh, you need to call First Liberty. So half of our cases probably come from that where somebody talks to somebody else to figure out how they can get help. The other half comes from, to be honest us reaching out to them. We’ll see something. You know, we have people on our team who every day are watching newspaper articles and other things because like let’s say Giovanni or something shows up in a newspaper. And it says Giovanni this fall, you know, fifth grade boy is able to read his favorite book at school or we reach out to him because most these people don’t even know that somebody is willing to help them for free. And so we do it that way. So it’s sometimes we reach out. Sometimes they come to us. And then the sad thing is that for what I just described to you, probably for every one of those, there’s probably 30 or 50 or 100 others who never connect. And just think they’ve got to fold. And that sort of gets your second part of the question, how do we let people know? That’s why I tell our attorneys all the time. You know, winning a case is important. But if you win a case against one school district, you won against one school district.

But if you actually get on the media or do educational things where you show the rest of the country that you just won, that you’ve maybe affected a thousand or two thousand school districts that say, gosh, I don’t want to do that, because that doesn’t look so good for that school district. So education is, I think, even more important than the litigation, because if we win freedoms and nobody knows they have them. You know, what good are we doing?

Henry Kaestner: Yeah. So that’s fascinating to me to let these other schools, these other jurisdictions know that there’s a 90 percent chance they’re going to fail at something like this. And just what does it look like to meet with administrators and educators and to educate them on what their students can and can’t do? And so that you never had the lunchroom lady telling that young girl that she can’t pray because she had heard about this case so I’d imagine outreach is a very big part. OK. Very helpful. Thank you very much.

Kelly Shackelford: Great question. And they think that all we do is legal, you know, and education is really important.

William Norvell: Speaking of education, I’m not a lawyer, but I’ve read 90 plus percent of John Grisham novels. So I feel like I’m pretty close right on the edge. And I’ve watched at least five of the movies. So I feel like I’m getting up the curve. The one thing Grisham never does, though, that you’ve done, he’s never written a book about the Supreme Court. He’s never gone into a Supreme Court. And I want to hear about what that feels like. In my imagination, you know, there’s this giant room. It must be 40, 50 feet tall where the Supreme Court hears cases and there’s robes. I’m guessing you probably still wear a wig, something to that effect. That would be my guess is how this plays out. But you can take that. You can leave it. But walk me through what it’s like a day in the Supreme Court, arguing in front of, you know, one of the most hallowed courts in the world in history?

Kelly Shackelford: It’s definitely hallowed, as you mentioned. I mean, the ceilings are very tall. I have no idea how many feet tall those ceilings are. And it’s pretty regal place. The way it works is you sort of wait in a lawyer’s lounge outside. I think that was probably the place I was the most nervous of any time of my life, just sitting in the lawyer’s lounge waiting to just come into the courtroom. Eventually you’re let in and you sit there. And at 10:00 a.m. Eastern, the arguments start. But how this works is you’re sitting there. The crowd is just completely full. And behind the justices are these columns and there are curtains between the columns.

And at 10:00 a.m. on the button, a gavel goes down very loudly and all. At one moment at 10:00 a.m. Eastern, all the justices who you don’t notice if you’ve never been there have been waiting right behind the curtains. And at 10:00 a.m., they all walk out when the gavel hits and sit down. So it’s pretty powerful sort of heads raising.

And then they start and then here’s what people don’t understand. Number one, you’re standing so close to the justices that you can’t see all nine at one time. You could really only see about four in your peripheral vision at one time, maybe five. And so you’re really close. It really is sort of a very personal conversation and people think that what happens is like some drama on TV. By the way, no wigs. We don’t do the barrister thing like in the UK. So no wigs unless you actually have a wig. But what people think is like somebody walks in. Like, I walk in there. I give this great speech and the justices clap and cry and all that. You know, that’s not the way it works. The way it works is these justices all have four of the brightest young attorneys in the country who are talking for them. It’s like a one year courtship. And they’re going through everything about your briefs, your legal arguments that have been filed and all the other briefings that has been filed. And so they have picked through everything. And if there’s a hole in your argument, which there always is, they know about it. And so as you walk in there and by the way, none of those justices have talked to one another yet. So they haven’t discussed their views on the case. They wait till after the oral arguments. So when you come up to make an oral argument, you get maybe 30 seconds uninterrupted and then they’re coming at you. But what’s happening is justice so-and-so is not necessarily really asking you a question. They’re asking that question to make a point to another justice. And your job is to answer the question. But to figure out what’s going on between them and what your numbers are and who you need to get to get to five to win. So it is a very fast moving, kind of thrilling you’re kind of a backboard for a battle going on with them, although they’re asking questions of you. So you have to do a couple things at one time. But I remember the first time I was up there in 1997 being very nervous in the lawyers lounge. And when I came in there, I was second my opponent got to go first. I remember two minutes into his argument, kind of like any athletic contest in my life. I remember thinking, I’m not nervous anymore. I just want my chance up there. I’m gonna cream this guy. And so it’s just kind of a normal adrenalin and everything, I think takes over like any other contest. We’ve all been in our life. But it’s definitely a hallowed ground. A real special place.

Henry Kaestner: Did you?

Kelly Shackelford: I did in the oral argument. But that didn’t win the case for me, unfortunately. All the reports were that I won the oral argument, but I was kind of fight an uphill battle. People thought it was a case that could be lost nine to zero. And I was able to pick up three of the justices. But I needed five. So it was a first good learning experience as a young attorney back in the 1990s.

Henry Kaestner: So now that was a loss. But clearly, 90 percent of that had been wins. What are some landmark victories that you’ve had?

Kelly Shackelford: Well, one of the big ones is what we just won this last summer. And that’s the Bladensburg Cross case. It’s a veterans memorial that was put up almost 100 years ago right outside of D.C., in Bladensburg, Maryland. It was put up by mothers who lost their sons in World War One and the American Legion. And it was to remember the forty nine young men in that county that had died in World War One. It was originally on American Legion Land. But because right side of DC, eventually they built roads. And when they built roads around it, the government state of Maryland took over the property for health and safety reasons, but they didn’t want to disturb a memorial. And so they didn’t. And then decades go by. And then the American humanists brought a lawsuit to say, hey, wait, you can’t have this cross that’s on government land. And they brought a lawsuit. And we went to the district court. We represented the American Legion as well as the descendants. You know, the mothers should put this up and their families on this monument. We wanted the district court, but the court of appeals. We got a very disturbing opinion. Not only did they declared unconstitutional all of a sudden after 100 years, but they said that maybe the solution was to cut the arms off of the cross so that they could keep it there, but nobody would have to be offended. At that point, we went to the Supreme Court and said, you know, look,.

William Norvell: So it would just be a singular vertical piece of lumber.

Kelly Shackelford: Exactly. And so we went to the Supreme Court.

William Norvell: That’s a pole at that point, not a cross.

Kelly Shackelford: That’s right. And problem with that is, you know this is three miles away from the Arlington National Cemetery. And you know, there’s a 24 foot cross there, the cross of sacrifice given us by Canada. There’s the Argonne Cross. There’s the Tomb of the Unknown Soldier that says “known to God.” I mean, if this type of sort of anti-religious approach is going to become the law of the land, then I mean, the whole landscape and every community of our country is going to have to undergo sandblasting and bulldozing of monuments and memorials that mentioned God or have crosses or stars of David or anything else.

So we went to the Supreme Court. But we because of the justice makeup, we had had some changes with the justices. For instance, Justice Kavanaugh was the newest justice and justice Kavanaugh actually donated time with me 20 years ago. He was a young attorney, so I knew he was very committed to religious freedom and the constitution.

And we felt like we had five justices for the first time in maybe 50 years who could overturn a really bad precedent that was causing a lot of these attacks on religion our whole lives. You know, when you see nativity scenes or menorahs or Ten Commandments monuments all being attacked, in our view wasn’t because there’s anything about that in the Constitution, it was because of this bad case called Lemon back in the nineteen 60s and 70s by the Warren Court, a very liberal court. And so we not only argued they shouldn’t tear down this memorial right outside of D.C., but we argued they really need to get rid of this decision, this test that has led to so much hostility to religion and so much confusion. And we won the case 7 to 2. But even more importantly, I think we won 5-4 on the decision that Lemon was not going to be followed. And I really felt like what happened there is for 50 years we’ve kind of had this government in this hostility to religion position and that just flipped and that’s no longer going to be so. And so we’ve still got to build out the positive side to this. But it’s a sea change and really a historic shift that just occurred. That was a really important victory, I think, for religious freedom and the future of our country.

William Norvell: Wow. That’s amazing. It’s amazing to think about and read about from time to time just how these precedents, to your point can last for decades, upon decades and decades and just continue to influence so many parts of the country. And as we do that, I’d love to shift to as you know, a lot of business owners are going to be listening to us. Could you maybe one tell us a little bit about the limitations that business owners have in your perspective and how the law protects our right to religious expression? And then also maybe mention a few cases that you have taken on of business owners to really show us that in an example or two.

Kelly Shackelford: Yeah, and I would say because, you know, if somebody doesn’t remember this or good way to follow a lot of this stuff is on our Web site. We have a lot of resources. They go to first liberty, you spell it out first liberty dot org. And there are all kinds of rights. One of the great pieces of news for people in business is if you’re an employer and if you’re an employee, you have religious freedom protection in the workplace. That’s really important because, you know, this is your livelihood. And if you had religious freedom, except when you’re at work, except when you’re trying to run your business, that would be a disaster because that’s where you spend most of your waking hours. There would be a total loss of religious freedom. But we have not only saw a case law, but we have actually statutes, federal and state statutes that require, you know, protection of religious freedom in the workplace. Whether you’re an employer or an employee. And so that’s sort of the good news. What I tell people who are business owners are employers, and they say, you know, what are my limitations? And when I speak to the Christian audiences, etc. a lot, I say, you know, here’s the great news for you. The only thing you’re not supposed to do, no Christian would ever want to do. And that is, do you have the ability to live out your faith? Yes, you do. What you can’t do is try to force somebody to follow your faith. You can’t say, Chris, can you have a Bible study? Sure you can. Can you require that everybody attend or they don’t work there anymore? No. And by the way, these federal laws I’m talking about, typically there’s 16 employees. That is when they kick in. But these are the kind of things, you know. So can you talk about your faith at work? Sure you can. So the whole point is employers get the fullest extent of religious liberty as long as there’s not some sort of force, coercion, whatever from them. The employees then also get the most religious liberty. They get to choose, so can you invite people to church? Sure you can. Can you say if you don’t come to church, you know I’m gonna fire you or you’ll never get a promotion? No, you can’t. So, again, the only things that are prohibited are things that I don’t know any Christian would do, which is to try to use their position to actually punish somebody if they didn’t have the same religious beliefs or go to the same church or anything else. So that’s sort of the good news. There’s been a lot of cases on this and we’ve had I don’t know how many religious freedom in the workplaces we’ve had. But I’ll just tell you this. We’ve yet to lose any of them. We won every single one of them. So I don’t want people to get intimidated out of doing what God is calling you to do at the workplace.

You might want to call us and ask, hey, how do we do this? But I guarantee you could do it. And the enemy is always going to try to intimidate you and use fear and really misinformation to stop you from doing that great thing that God is calling you to do. So don’t let that stop you. Call us and ask a question if you’re wondering how to reverse that, because there are companies that are very big and very much strong about their faith and think that interstate batteries and a lot of these different companies that are really large and you think where they are, they they’re very large, yet they’re very, very intentional about their faith and their values that they stand for.

And yet they provide freedom for their employers. They just provide opportunities for them to come to the Bible study to get the counseling for their marriage. Yeah, a lot of different things to serve and love on them. And a lot of people use chaplains. There’s a number of chaplain groups, Marketplace Ministries and others. And maybe you have your business for 30 years and you have some success. But maybe the most important thing is you had some chaplains and maybe 20, maybe 50, maybe a hundred people came to know the Lord because you just had chaplains that were available to counsel, to help them, to marry people, because there are some people that come into your business that will never walk in a church. And the only way to have that access is if you have like a chaplain that comes once a month, once a week, whatever, to serve your people. So there’s just lots of freedoms and ideas. And I just encourage you, you know, do what the Lord’s calling you to do and call us if we can help you.

Henry Kaestner: That’s an awesome encouragement. And we’re right on with it. We love chaplaincy marketplace chaplains and corporate chaplains of America, great way to love on your employees in a way that points to something again greater than the manufacturing distribution of widgets. I want to bring in a topic that’s on the top of mind. And just to timestamp this event, we’re talking about this in April of 2020 during the time of Covid 19. And a lot of businesses been shut down and a lot of businesses are trying to understand what can they do and what can’t they do? What are their rights? How should they be thinking about Covid-19? Walk us through a framework on how to think about that, please.

Kelly Shackelford: Yeah, I’ll tell you, this is one of these unusual things I’ve been talking to a lot of national business leaders on this because there’s really an overlapping or similar issue for churches. And that is that churches don’t know how to open, just like businesses are trying to figure out how to open. And the problem is there’s never been sort of constitutional law in a pandemic. And there just wasn’t a lot out there. And so we knew when this thing started, I mean, one of the things we did as an organization is we sat down as soon as this started and we got all of our team together.

We said, look, this is different. Everything has just changed. The challenge to every person here is to begin thinking outside the box to be creative. You know, we’ve talked a lot in our group about how barriers a lot of times to what you’re trying to do. Sort of two things that happen. Number one, it causes you to try new things that maybe you wouldn’t have tried. Which is a great thing. And number, two. It causes you to focus much more intensely because you were blocked from what you’re trying to do. So we think that way here and we sort of almost became the religious freedom experts in the midst of a pandemic. And churches all over the country were coming to us. And the problem is we knew there would be a lot of power and deference to the government at the beginning of this, because there would be a lot of fear and there’s a public health and safety issues. But we knew that over time as that started to recede, that there would be some government entities that would want to keep that power and want to shut down people when they had no authority to do so. And we needed to be ready. And so the first case we had, it was the first case ever in the history of our country in the midst of a pandemic was the case we had in Louisville. It was a church that was doing a drive in service, meaning you drive to church in your car. And it was a way to have communal worship and everything except no danger and meeting every CDC guideline. So unless the CDC was going to come up with something new that you can now catch the corona virus from an automobile, which is obviously silly, then that’s safe and that’s what they did.

Well, the city of Louisville not only said they would come after them criminally if they held their service, but the governor sent the police all across the state to write down the license plates of anybody who was at church on Easter Sunday. And then they were going to be taking action against them, forced quarantines and all this afterwards. So we wanted a really good case to really set the standard in the press that says this is really important about our freedoms. And I think people were thinking. Things have gotten so off the rails are wondering, do we still have our constitutional system? And the great news is we had an incredible opinion by this federal judge. Just incredible. And it really said, hey, we’re still a constitutional republic. These freedoms are still here. While we respect the government in protecting public health. They can’t do things that are discriminatory, that are irrational. And he just went into the religious freedom history of our country and laid out a powerful order. And I think it set the stage for everybody, religious and nonreligious, about. We do have a constitutional system. So these guidelines and these government officials are going to be allowed to do things that really are shown evidence wise to be public health protectors, but they’re not going to be allowed to do things that discriminate, that that aren’t rational, that aren’t backed up, and that, you know, destroy constitutional freedoms in the process. So you have to analyze each of these and you have to look at what they’re doing. And, you know, I’m sure most businesses, just like most churches, they don’t want anybody to get sick or anything. And so they’re going to try to follow everything they can do to keep people safe. You know, it’s not a perfect world. So people are going to have things go wrong. And so what we’ve done with a lot of our clients so far is they’ve been following those CDC guidelines so that they’re safe if anybody does try to come after them. And I think that’s a great way for businesses to be safe as well as just make sure you’re following those, you know, social distancing and the different things that they’re suggesting. And I think as we go on again, more power will be returned to the individuals and to the businesses and less will be in the government. But it’s a scary time right now for a lot of folks. And another whole subject that we could talk about is liability, because that’s one of the things that we’re having to deal with right now, is if you don’t follow one of these things, if they give you a list of 17 pages of things you should do and you don’t follow one now, you’re gonna get sued by somebody because you didn’t noticefFootnote 4 on page fifteen. And so we’re actually talking a lot in D.C. to the White House and others about if there could be some sort of immunity to keep from a lot of these frivolous lawsuits that might come to try to harass. Because we want our businesses to open. We want our churches so open. And as long as they’re being very reasonable, then what They’re doing they should be protected.

Henry Kaestner: Do you get a sense that there’s going to be some sort of ruling on that? Because I know that that is indeed that liability is a big fear for lots of small businesses. And the fear of that, whether you’re a dry cleaner or barbershop, is somebody coming back after you because you didn’t file that footnote. You anticipate that’s something? Do you have any purview into the legislative agenda with the CARES Act and other related acts tha? Might address this issue.

Kelly Shackelford: Yeah, it’s being worked on right now. I just don’t know if we’re going to have the votes. I know that there are a number of people trying to carry this, whether they can get something through the House and the Senate to do that. If not, one of these we’re suggesting is that language be added in front of these CDC guidelines that make clear that these are not like some sort of medical standard of care that’s been hammered out for years and years and therefore, they shouldn’t be used in litigation. Something like that might be helpful as well, because some states are doing a better job than others. For instance, take churches. What Texas did is they said you can now meet in person. Here are the five things, though, we think you should do. You know what? People can do five things. But you give them the fifteen pages, you’re really putting them in an unwieldy situation. And so that’s the problem is if they go into a bill with, you know, every possible thing they can think of, then they’re really going to freeze a lot of people or scare a lot of people when, you know, I think people want to be safe and they’re going to try to be safe. And I think if you’re a little simpler with what you provide, you’ll get better results anyway. But it’s definitely something that we’re all concerned about, both on the business side and on the church or religious freedom side. And we’re hoping there’ll be a solution. Certainly we’ll be doing all we can to make that happen.

William Norvell: We appreciate that. Kelly, that’s an amazing story. Thanks for walking us through a lot of this today as we come to a close and I don’t know if we’re equipped for this, but I feel like a Q&A session with a bunch of our Faith driven entrepreneurs One Day would be an awesome podcast. So to figure out some production quality there. But as we close, what I would love to know is where does God have you today? We love allowing our listeners into our guest lives and seeing where the word of God can be coming alive to you in a new way. Could be something he brought to you this morning during this crisis. Could be something you’ve been meditating on for a season, your life or over a few years, just wherever his word may be coming to you, if you would share them with our audience, we would be grateful.

Kelly Shackelford: Yeah. I mean, for me, it’s been just sort of almost standing back in amazement at what God does. You know, as I said when we came into this, I mean, if you had told me four years ago, hey, can you get rid of that bad lemon case and really free up religious freedom? I would’ve said probably not in my lifetime. And, you know, three years later this last summer, we just changed really history with that case. And as we started this Covid-19 journey again, we were like, Lord, you let us have these opportunities. You know, we want to work really hard, but you’re the one who provides these things that allow us to do things we can never do on our own. And just in the last three or four weeks, we’ve just been blown away. I mean, we have a meeting on Monday morning, our prayer meeting as a group with people all over the country. And everybody is looking at each other on Zoom going, how did the Lord just allow us to do that? You know, the CARES Act legislation. People don’t know this, but every church is allowed to participate and every religious nonprofit. Well, we were able to see that there were some dangers in the act and we were able to get through a protection on the last day that protected every church and every religious nonprofit in the country. And they have no idea, you know, that Louisville case we’re talking about. It’s the first case ever in the history of the country in a pandemic about constitutional freedoms. And it was just a grand slam. And the fact that God let us do that. I mean, you know, every week there’s been another miracle. It’s almost like something we could have never constructed in our own hands, that God just let us have the opportunity. And so that’s been I guess, the really the thing I’m kind of sitting back in amazement and just saying, Lord, without you, we really can’t do anything. But with you, we can do anything. And if we’ll just trust and wait on him, the incredible things we get to do that we could never dream of is what happens.

Henry Kaestner: It’s a great word. Kelly, thank you very much for spending your time. Thank you for your life’s calling. Thirty years of protecting religious freedoms. May God bless you and your team during this crazy time. And we look forward to having you back on. We’re going to go ahead and put up a link to this show notes and some of thn materials and some of the cases that you are talking about. And in addition to the piece you mentioned, the federal judge had written about this time, just really grateful for it. Thank you.

Kelly Shackelford: Thank you, guys, for what you guys do as well.

The Rise of Gospel-Shaped Businesses

This article was originally published here by Christianity Today

— by Christianity Today and C12 Group

When most people hear about stewardship, workplace chaplains and employee satisfaction surveys are rarely what spring to mind. But for a cadre of business owners integrating faith within their businesses for a Business as a Ministry (BaaM) operating system, that only scratches the surface of their stewardship.

A steward is responsible to manage an asset on someone’s behalf. While work is often compartmentalized from faith, stewardship for Christian leaders demands seeing their entire businesses as belonging to God. They operate according to His standards and values and integrate biblical principles in everything from choosing health care plans to finding ways to show the love of Christ to His people. As business owners oversee people and resources, they are not only tending to others’ welfare and wallets but also to their eternal wellbeing.

Applying biblical principles to shape best practices in business may sound challenging or scandalously illegal, but it’s surprisingly achievable and worthwhile. And while this view of stewardship may seem to be an ethereal, fluid concept, ministry can be objectively measured with worthy metrics of success much like any other dimension of thriving business.

The Opportunity for Impact

John Davenport Engineering, Inc (DAVENPORT), a consulting firm that has been providing engineering solutions for nearly 20 years, aims to nurture “fertile ground” in the workplace, creating a place where employees know their spiritual growth is supported and encouraged.

Revenue generation at DAVENPORT isn’t just a means for larger offices and higher salaries. Davenport Jr., the company’s CEO, sees growing the business as a way to increase its impact, making the work it does more meaningful and rewarding. It’s another way of pursuing what he calls “win-win” solutions. One simple question guides John’s decision-making, proposed solutions, and company policies: “Spiritually and professionally, how do we meet [employees and partners] where they are to help them grow?”

Offering opportunities like paid time off to volunteer and employee-led local mission efforts creates a corporate culture where employees get to practice their faith while at work.

Todd Stewart, president of Gulf Winds International, is also intentional about leading a business as ministry. He has created a strategic plan for ministry—a systematic envisioning of a desired future along with goals and the necessary steps to reach them—and he’s woven that into the fibers of his business. At Gulf Winds, this focus starts at the individual level with each employee. “Meeting the needs of the individual employee through corporate sponsored programs, partnerships, a values-driven culture, coaching, and team development” is how the Gulf Winds team fosters a spiritually fulfilling work atmosphere.

Considering many employees spend more time with their coworkers than with their families, the marketplace offers a large platform to share the life and love of Christ. But without effective planning, good intentions can be derailed by a lack of clarity and accountability to accomplish a company’s vision for spiritual impact. Christian leaders can meet the challenge of successful stewardship by implementing a strategic plan similar to Stewart’s.

Finding the Right Tools

If a business owner struggled with shrinking sales, he or she would invest a great deal of time and resources into fixing the problem. Leaders can plan and execute ministry-minded initiatives in the same way. C12 Group, a global provider of peer advisory groups and resources for Christian business leaders, developed their 5-Point Alignment Matrix to help leaders align all operations with their company’s central mission, vision, and core values. By positioning ministry alongside other core dimensions, the Matrix prevents sprinkling it on top of one’s business as an afterthought. Instead, it approaches ministry from the same strategic planning lens as operations, organizational development, revenue generation, and financial management. It’s an entirely new operating system based upon the idea of Business as a Ministry (BaaM).

The surest way to minister in business is to fold the gospel into routine conduct. Rather than force-feeding the gospel to others, effective Christian business owners recognize and tangibly meet needs—physical, emotional, and spiritual—like the example set by Christ.

For Stewart at Gulf Winds, traditional measurements, such as operation ratios and accuracy percentages, only partially define a business’s success. Ministry efforts are a part of the business plan at every level. Among other activities, the company offers weekly Bible studies, local and global mission trips, marriage seminars, a benevolence fund, and space allocated in their warehouse for use by nonprofits.

While strategic planning is the essential preparatory work for effective ministry, measuring progress is the subsequent imperative. In the absence of clearly defined goals, people can become slaves to activity and exertion without accountability and fruitfulness. In what is known as the Hawthorne effect, what is measured, discussed, and reinforced tends to improve.

In fact, the Bible repeatedly demonstrates the importance of measuring with numbers. Jesus discipled 12 apostles, fed 5,000 people with 5 loaves of bread and 2 fish, and gave 10 minas to 10 servants. Even Peter had a rate of return—3,000 souls—when he preached the gospel at Pentecost. Measuring doesn’t have to detract or distract from ministry; rather, it brings definition. At DAVENPORT, for example, John has visibility into the impact of their activities as tracked and measured by their third-party corporate chaplains and internal ministry team.

Defining and Finding Success

Speaking with Christianity Today from São Paulo, Brazil, where he was doing missions work, Stewart describes his business as about “more than freight.” He defines success as less of a moving goalpost and more of a fulfillment of a calling, saying, “We believe if we truly live out this mission and these core values for the glory of God, we have been faithful and successful.”

John Davenport shares a similar outlook. “I feel successful when an individual leaves saying, ‘You know what? This group of people are good people.’ They have moved along a spectrum and are that much closer to coming into [God’s] kingdom.”

It might be intimidating to imagine a business that is truly shaped by the gospel and led with ministry in mind. Putting these principles into practice can take time, focus, and mentorship. But business owners are often surprised by the freedoms they have to share about their faith in the workplace. Mentorship and counsel from like-minded peers has proven to help produce rewarding results. As Davenport says, “If you take your focus off of the ‘bottom line’ being just about money, the bottom line is taken care of.”

Business is not only an economic engine to fund ministries but can be a ministry itself as new levels of flourishing and fruitfulness grow out of a holistic, faithful approach. When owners see every decision as an act of Biblical stewardship as they include spiritual metrics, the eternal return on investment is immeasurable.

——

[Photo by Campaign Creators on Unsplash]

Garden City by John Mark Comer

We continue to count down the Top 100 Books for Faith Driven Entrepreneurs with…

Garden City: Work, Rest, and the Art of Being Human

by John Mark Comer

You’ve heard people say “Who you are matters more than what you do”. Does the Bible really teach that? 

In Garden City, popular pastor and speaker John Mark Comer gives a fresh take on our calling and our purpose, with a surprisingly counter-culture take. Through his creative and conversational style, Comer takes a good look at Genesis and the story of a man, a woman, and a garden. He unpacks God’s creation and his original intent for how we are meant to spend our time. Here, you’ll find answers to questions like “Does God care where I work?”  “What about what I do with my free time or how much rest I get?” “Does he have a clear direction for me?”

Practical and theologically rich, Garden City speaks to twenty and thirty-somethings who are figuring out next steps and direction in their lives. Garden City is the Purpose Driven Life for the next generation—the book that helps us answer why we are here and what should we do about it.

Click on the book cover to check out the Reviews and Purchase at Amazon


Power and Leverage in a Time of Crisis

The sands of time on which we stand continue to shift all around us. Poised leaders who are used to being in control are constantly putting out fires. Faithful and qualified employees find themselves hunting for new jobs on LinkedIn. And the relationships between entrepreneurs and investors are as uncertain as ever.

Thankfully, leaders stepped up to lead the charge on how Christian business leaders and investors should respond to the power and leverage they have (or don’t have) during these pressing times. Below, you’ll find an email that Luke Roush & Jake Thomsen sent to Sovereign’s Capital portfolio companies. We believe their words of wisdom can encourage you as well…

———

by Luke Roush & Jake Thomsen

One of the questions we’ve fielded in recent days is what is an appropriate vs. inappropriate use of leverage is during a time of crisis. The specific context where this conversation is that a well known private equity firm recently announced:

“We just called all the landlords of our portfolio companies and said ‘We’ll give you 50% of your rent for the next 90 days, take it or leave it. This is not to be repaid later…it just is what it is.’ – At this point, 100% of our landlords have taken these terms.”

This and other recent examples sparked an internal conversation about what is appropriate and inappropriate during these extraordinary times. As we prayed through this topic and sought counsel from our chaplain, Toby Kurth, here are two concepts we think are appropriate to reference:

1) Crisis Reveals Character – The question is what will this crisis reveal about my character? What does it look like to pursue righteousness in this environment? There are many places to go in Scripture that deal with integrity and keeping our word. Even deeper than that, as followers of Jesus, an all-of-life pursuit of righteousness should guide everything we do in personal and public life.

Proverbs 2:20-22 is instructive:

“So you will walk in the way of the good and keep to the paths of the righteous. For the upright will inhabit the land, and those with integrity will remain in it, but the wicked will be cut off from the land, and the treacherous will be rooted out of it.”

We also draw wisdom from Matthew 5:37:

“But let your ‘Yes’ be ‘Yes,’ and your ‘No,’ ‘No.’ For whatever is more than these is from the evil one.”

2) Righteousness – Tim Keller’s commentary on this topic is particularly helpful – “BE RIGHTEOUS. When Proverbs speaks of the righteous and the wicked, we think it means the ‘moral’ and the ‘immoral.’ That is only part right. The Hebrew words for righteous—tzedeq and mishpat—have a strong social aspect. Bruce Waltke writes: ‘The righteous are willing to disadvantage themselves to advantage the community; the wicked are willing to disadvantage the community to advantage themselves.’” (Keller, God’s Wisdom for Navigating Life)

In light of this wisdom, here would be a few points as each of you lead through your unique set of circumstances:

1) Situational Awareness – In times like these, it’s appropriate to re-examine all obligations in your business. This includes supplier contracts, customer contracts, real estate contracts, employment contracts, etc. Our faith and how that is reflected in and through our work is non-negotiable, but many other things are negotiable in extraordinary times like the ones we’re living through. We encourage you to engage early and often in collaborative (as opposed to combative) discussion with counterparties, recognizing that we have more in the way of a shared destiny than a zero-sum game.

2) Competing Priorities – Leaders are called to balance different priorities to include creditors, investors, staff, vendors, customers, landlords, etc. In a world where fulfillment of all obligations becomes impossible, how do we as leaders sort through these priorities? These are good things to wrestle with, and tradeoffs may be necessary. Our legal system has some definition around creditor prioritization, but if you’re wrestling with this, our Sovereign’s team is happy to be a sounding board – anytime day or night.

3) Our Word as a Bond – If two parties agree to re-negotiate a contract, that’s reasonable and appropriate. What it looks like to “bear down” and get an appropriate deal given a host of different conditions can be widely variable. What isn’t appropriate is to walk away from obligations without conversation, or with our only conversation to be a “take it or leave it…if you leave it, we’ll see you in court” negotiation as we pound the table…see Matthew 5:37 above. 🙂

Our hope is that this counsel is helpful, as you actively pray and discern how The Lord is calling you to act and steward what He has put in your charge.

Millennial Leadership: Stop Complaining, Start Coaching

This talk was given at a TEDx event using the TED conference format but independently organized by a local community. Learn more at TEDx Talk.

— by Danita Bye

Danita speaks about how millennials want a coach and a mentor rather than a boss. She asks the questions “What are the coaching and mentoring micro-moves that we can make that will have a major lifetime empire state building impact on our millenials?” and “Will YOU be that domino difference?” Danita Bye, M.A. is a leadership and sales development expert. She is the founder of Sales Growth Specialists and has gained valuable leadership experience as a sales leader for Xerox Corporation and in private equity ownership. Danita served on the boards of private Christian universities. She currently serves on the North Dakota Economic Development Foundation, as well as the North Dakota Petroleum Council. She is a member of the Forbes Coaches Council and is a sales coach for Harvard Business School MBA students. Her headquarters are in North Dakota, but Danita works digitally and her business operates on a global scale. Danita grew up on The Triple T Ranch in Stanley, North Dakota. Her parents continue to make a huge imprint on her life. They are entrepreneurs who figured out how to not only survive but thrive in homestead country.

——

[Thanks to NeONBRAND for the cover photo]

The Power of a Coming-of-Age Celebration for Your Children

— by Cory M. Carlson

In Matthew 28:19–20 we are called to go and make disciples. A lot of us are familiar with this verse, and we tend to think it applies only outside the home. We spend a lot of time looking for people to go and build into, but if we’re not careful, we can completely overlook our own kids! 

Intentional investments into our kids will have a greater impact than anything else we do. Kids want our time more than anything. Our presence over our provision. Yes, they love their iPhones and tablets, but often they are playing with those because we are not giving them attention. Do you blame them? We do the same thing. When we are at stoplights, in lines, and even on the toilet, we are on our phones. Our kids are like us. 

We need to go out on dates with our kids and do what they want so they feel loved, plus we get to know them better. Yes, there can be some valuable time talking and driving around together, whether we’re going on errands or to and from their activities, but the real value for them is when they know we are taking time out of our schedule to be with them. 

For my teenage daughter, it is going to Starbucks and talking. 

For my younger kids, it’s going out for ice cream or a donut. It doesn’t matter where as long as it is a time in which you are being intentional with your kids. In our family, the goal is to do at least one date per month per kid. 

Parenting is about intentionality with our children, so they know who they are and whose they are, guiding them in what to do with their life and helping shape how to live it out. 

As adults, we all have struggled to better understand our identity. If it is hard for us, think how hard it is for our kids! As parents, we need to be proactive and speak into our kids’ identities. If we don’t guide them properly, somebody else will, and they could end up making similar mistakes as we have, or worse. 

DESIGNING A COMING-OF-AGE CELEBRATION 

A few summers ago, our daughter Kiley turned thirteen, and we wanted to celebrate her transition from a little girl to a young lady. Obviously, coming-of-age celebrations are not a new concept. One thinks of the Bat/Bar Mitzvah, tribal-type ceremonies in other countries, and the over-the-top celebrations on MTV’s My Sweet 16. But Christians and nonreligious people don’t really have a standard coming-of-age celebration. 

In addition, when my wife and I were looking for coming-of-age ceremonies, we found great information for a father to do with his son or for a mother to do with her daughter. 

But we couldn’t find anything for fathers and daughters or both parents and a daughter. 

Stories and studies demonstrate that when children lose their way in life, it often can be traced back to a wound from their earthly father abandoning, ignoring, or abusing them. Later in life they try to fill the father void with sex, work, food, drugs, etc. 

My wife and I wanted to put a stake in the ground. We want- ed to affirm who our daughter is, that she is defined by her identity as a daughter of God, not by how many social media likes she has or whether boys ask for her phone number or whether she’s the best dancer at her studio. We wanted her to know she is living from a place of approval instead of for approval. 

Our ceremony was a combination of resources and ideas from organizations we are involved in or that we came across during preparation. The New Frontier I mentioned earlier has fathers and sons participate in an impactful ceremony during the father/ son weeks in Montana (thenewfrontierministries.org). Also, Senior Pastor Brian Tome of Crossroads Church in Cincinnati did an incredible sermon series and has written a book on The Five Marks of a Man, which includes five significant ways men are different from boys. Again, we were able to incorporate some of this material. The close of our ceremony came from an amazing story in Exodus 38 that I heard author Kate Battistelli talk about on the radio one morning. 

In addition to these resources, my wife and I studied Proverbs 31, which is rich with words and traits of a godly woman. We identified five specific words we felt were significant to a young lady transitioning into a young woman that were applicable to our daughter at this time in her life. If we do this ceremony again when she is older, we may pick other words that are applicable to her at eighteen, such as “entrepreneur” or “business minded.” We may also pick different words for our second daughter, such as “creative,” since she is wired for art and creativity. 

Following are the five words from Proverbs 31 that embody who Kiley is at this time and what we felt God wanted us to affirm in her: 

CHARACTER—trustworthiness, integrity, wisdom, and kindness (vv. 10–12) 

COMMITTED—to faith, family, friends, school, and work (vv. 13–19) 

G E N E R O U S —of time, talent, and treasures (vv. 20–22) 

INFLUENTIAL—live a life worth imitating (vv. 23–26) 

EXCELLENCE—everything you do is for the Glory of God (vv. 27–31) 

We then asked some family members and close friends to write a letter to Kiley based on one of the five words. We assigned each person the one word we thought they lived out the most and asked them to write a letter about what this word means to them. For the men involved, we also asked them to share how they see it played out in a godly woman. For the women, we asked them to reflect on how the assigned word has affected their lives and to offer any wisdom they could share with a thirteen-year-old girl. 

We then put all the letters in a beautifully bound book with pictures from throughout Kiley’s life. I cannot tell you how amazing the book is! The treasure of the book in itself is worth doing the ceremony! We often joke that we could sell this book on Amazon and just substitute the name of the customer for our daughter’s name. The book is full of incredible insight and wisdom. 

I invited the men who wrote a letter to come to our house around 4:00 p.m. on her birthday and discuss the words with our daughter. I’m not going to lie; it started off a little awkward with Kiley at the head of the dining room table and these grown men sitting around the table and staring at her. But after a few awkward minutes it burst open with greatness. We discussed each word for about fifteen minutes, the guys read their letters, and we prayed over her. 

Now, will she remember all the great things these men said that night? Absolutely not. I don’t even remember. But she will always have their letters, and she will not forget there are godly men who can speak into her life, help her out when needed, or just be prayer warriors working behind the scenes for her. She knows she is not alone. 

The next part of the celebration was when my wife and I took her to a fancy dinner that evening. We got dressed up, ate a nice meal, celebrated her, and we each shared our thoughts with her based on the five words. The dinner was special. Laughs and tears. 

Then we came back home. Now it was Holly and a group of women sitting around the table with Kiley, and they did the same thing. The ladies talked about the five words, ate dessert, and had a great time. 

BURN YOUR MIRRORS 

The last part of our night was the perfect close to an amazing evening. Holly and I have participated in a ceremony called “Burn Your Ships” at Crossroads Church, which is based on a story from the 1500s when Captain Hernán Cortés landed in Veracruz and told his crew to burn their ships because they were not going to retreat. I have always liked this idea of burning your ships or fears or whatever is holding you back, so when I heard this story from Kate Battistelli on Exodus 38:8, I knew we had to include it in our ceremony. 

The Bible tells us the Israelite women were asked to burn their bronze mirrors so the liquid metal could be used in constructing the washbasins at the tabernacle. Kate said this illustrates that while women are beautiful and reflect God’s glory, how women look should not define their self-image or come before their identity as God’s daughter. 

We gave Kiley a bronze mirror and a marker to write on it anything she was struggling with, that was getting in the way of her relationship with God or just holding her back from living life to the full. I don’t know what she wrote on the mirror because it was private, but I am sure it had to do with pressure to get perfect grades, social media likes, getting a boyfriend, being a great dancer, and the list goes on. After she was done writing, we had her throw it in the fire! 

After she threw the mirror in the fire, we watched it burn, symbolizing that all those fears and worries were burned. They do not define her. We celebrated and then gave her a new bronze mirror with the five words from the ceremony embroidered on the mirror frame! 

The evening was amazing. 

We must affirm our kids for who they are now and cast a vision for who they can become, not what the noise of the world is telling them. Somebody is building into your kids. Make your voice louder than the others. 

MORE THAN JUST A DAY 

Kiley’s coming-of-age celebration was an amazing experience, but it happened over the course of one day. Obviously, declaring our children’s identities is not just a one-day project. Once we had the ceremony, it was critical to continue with regular investments. 

Kiley and I go on dates and discuss how she is living out the five words in her life as well as how she is living as a daughter of God. When Holly and I see her exemplifying a positive character trait, we affirm her. When Kiley is deflated due to a bad test result or unsatisfactory dance recital, we remind her that she is not defined by her test results or dance ranking, but instead she is a daughter of God. Similarly, if she gets first place and pride creeps in, no question we are there to cheer her on, but over time we also discuss the risks of tying identity to temporal success. 

Without the regular investments, the temptations of how the world defines failure and success will start to creep in and affect Kiley’s mindset. The identity ceremony requires follow up to provide transformation and lifelong impact, otherwise it is just an inspirational night and nice memory. 

NEVER TOO EARLY OR TOO LATE 

Some of you may be thinking your kids are too young, or maybe you think you missed the boat because your kids are in their twenties. 

It is never too early or too late! 

For those with young kids, how amazing to be learning about the importance of identity at this age in your child’s life. Our kids’ identity needs to be tied to character, values, and mindset instead of their achievements (straight A’s, goals scored in a soccer game, etc.). As you compliment your kids at this young age, be sure to compliment their character over their competency. Compliment their values over their outcomes. 

Getting this right now will set them up for success later. 

You are also never too late to affirm your kids’ identity! Even if they are out of the house or already married, it is not too late. All children need to have their identity spoken over them, especially by their parents. 

At The New Frontier we will get a father in his fifties or sixties with his son in his twenties or thirties, and to have that father speak over his son is always a tear-jerker for me. Nothing can make a young man feel so vulnerable, yet honorable, as to hear words of affirmation and identity spoken over him by his earthly father. 

LESSONS FROM THE #METOO MOVEMENT 

In recent years women have begun reporting high-powered men who sexually abused or harassed them in their Hollywood, business, or news media careers. This became known as #MeToo Movement because female victims were using social media and the #MeToo hashtag as a way to build awareness. 

Affirming our kid’s identity is critical for many reasons, one of which is that our kids are tomorrow’s leaders. We need to be correctly affirming their identity, so they can humbly yet confidently lead and not be a prey or the predator in sexual harassment, racial or gender discrimination, or other abuses of power in the workplace. 

We need to affirm our sons’ identities, so they do not slip throughout life and end up being a predator—looking for affirmation of who they are, trying to fill a void in their heart, and pursuing immediate gratification. We need to affirm our daughters’ identities too, so they can have the self-confidence and self-esteem to avoid compromising situations. 

RECALIBRATION QUESTIONS 

  1. Which of your kids need to have their identity affirmed?

  2. How and when will you do the identity ceremony?

  3. How have you complimented your children’s character over their competency lately?

——

[Thanks to Alex Guillaume for the cover photo]