Fear and Trembling and Defining Success
— by Amanda Lawson
Therefore, my dear friends, as you have always obeyed—not only in my presence, but now much more in my absence—continue to work out your salvation with fear and trembling, for it is God who works in you to will and to act in order to fulfill His good purpose.
Philippians 2:12-13
I recently started a job that involves teaching and researching on the integration of faith and entrepreneurship at the university level. When I was in grad school, I taught undergraduate courses, and in the process of generating a master’s thesis, I did my fair share of academic research and writing. These practices aren’t new to me. As a believer with previous experience as a youth pastor, I know the Lord and have experience teaching people about Jesus and walking with Him—imperfectly and with a lot of stumbling. So when I began in my current role, everything I was expected to do was something I had already spent years doing. Logically, I should have had confidence.
I did not.
Part of that stemmed from the tension that I felt navigating the line of teaching about integrating faith and entrepreneurship at a public university. Part of it was the subject matter of the topic I was teaching on: Success, Failure, and Contentment (and Humility). Part of it was that one of my greatest mentors (and coincidentally, my boss) was going to be in the room. I was talking to some friends about the class and shared with them that the only way I could truly express how I felt about it was Philippians 2:12, where Paul encourages the people to “work out [their] salvation with fear and trembling.”
Fear and trembling pretty much summed up how I felt about everything I was facing. While I had plenty of experience teaching and researching, and in speaking publicly from a faith-based perspective, the extent to which I felt fear and trembling about my job was almost tangible. While I was overwhelmingly excited about the opportunity to be a part of this work, I felt the weight. I didn’t want to say the wrong thing, to disappoint my boss and mentor, to mislead our students, to dishonor the Lord.
A friend encouraged me to remember the next verse: “for it is God who works in you to will and to act in order to fulfill His good purpose.” He finishes what He starts. It was the perspective shift I needed. It wasn’t about me. I cannot begin to explain the ways we have seen God bless the work we are doing. I cannot deny He is in the middle of it. So, while there is weight in what we are called to do, it is God who is working in us, for His good purpose.
That truth took me back to the beginning of verse 12: “therefore, my beloved, as you have always obeyed…” Now, I surely have not always obeyed. The verses before this declare the glorious reality that one day everyone will bow before Jesus and confess that He is Lord, and that this is why we obey. We know now what the rest of the world doesn’t yet: He is Lord. So, because I see that now, I obey Him now. Even if that obedience takes me into places and situations that stir up my nerves, I say yes in reverence to the lordship of the One who called me.
As faith driven entrepreneurs, I think we’re all pretty familiar with the whole “fear and trembling” thing. Whether it’s the risk of starting a new venture, investing in one, hiring the underdog, leaving the job that offered stability and security, we’ve all likely faced moments (years?) where we worked out our story with fear and trembling.
Fear and trembling aren’t bad or wrong. But you cannot ignore what comes before and behind: that we have the joy of obedience because we are blessed to know the end of the story, and that it is God who is working in and through us to carry out His good purpose. When we have that perspective, fear and trembling are more about being in awe of the God who orchestrates the plan, rather than what we think it will take to work out our role in it.
So, I taught a class of 20 college students about how integrating faith and entrepreneurship may influence their perception of success, failure, and contentment. I was nervous until the moment the class started and was leaning on the Spirit for the right words. The fear and trembling were palpable. Then I remembered Philippians 2:12-13 and my perspective shifted.
For someone teaching on the subject of success, my definition of the word itself has changed a lot and the specifics are, let’s say, elusive. In working out what to say, I found myself realizing a beautiful truth about my own understanding of success. It turns out, both my perspective on teaching the class and my definition of success comes back to Philippians 2:12-13.
Success is obedience to the One who called and created me.
It’s simple. It’s not about a dollar amount, a ranking, a following, or a title. Success doesn’t ignore nerves, but it doesn’t succumb to them either. It’s not a matter of striving or faking it till you make it, nor is it passively waiting to be handed the dream position. I’ve come to realize that success truly lies in obeying Him, remaining in awe of the One whose plan you’re a part of, because it’s ultimately God who is accomplishing the work. The results and outcomes are His, not mine. The fear and trembling aren’t paralyzing, they lead us to a right perspective and leave us in awe of the Author.